Awake: The Strength Of Their Love
by Marie King
Summary: Sam is horrified about her husband dying during his heart transplant surgery. But that isn't the only reason she is frighted will Clay's mother approve of her and Clay's marriage?


Sam Lockwood was getting extremely frustrated with her fiancé, Clay Beresford

She was upset because he still hadn't told his mother of their six-month engagement.

What she wanted more than anything was for Mrs. Beresford to give their marriage her blessing and for Clay to stop having to obsess over what would be the right moment to finally tell her.

_It isn't good for his condition and he knows it!_ Sam thought with a twinge of anger but mostly concern.

Clay had a rare heart condition and had been on the transplant list for over a year he had to take many different kinds of medication just to keep him functioning.

Sam worried about him all the time and so did his mother.

The main reason she knew why Clay hadn't told his mom of their relationship was that Sam was his mother's personal assistant.

She didn't blame him for that both of them knew that when they started their relationship that it was going to be hard on both of them, but she had no idea that it would be so hard on Clay.

He hated lying to his mother all the time and she knew it caused him more stress then he was already under, but he had no idea on how to tell her the truth so he continued to lie to her.

Now the only way they could be together was in secret meeting in her apartment which was in Brooklyn.

Then they would both get up early in the morning so Sam could drive him to the townhouse he shared with his mom in Manhattan.

Clay would change for work before his mother awakened so has not to rouse any suspicion about his relationship with her.

Finally Sam got up out of bed and went to the bathroom brushed her hair then she pulled it up with a clasp and went to over to the bath tub.

She looked down into it and saw that Clay was submerged under the water his eyes open.

_Oh there he is again I'll never understand why he does this but it's important to him so I better not disturb him. _

Sam then quietly squatted next to the tub and waited for Clay to come up which he did a few seconds later.

She smiled warmly at him and gently stroked his hand, she looked into his eyes lovingly as did he.

Finally Sam asked tenderly "Hey, so what were you doing under there, I was beginning to worry about you."

Clay smiled at her and said softly "Hey yourself, I was just thinking, sorry Sam, I didn't mean to scare you."

Sam's smile turned into a playful grin she stood up sitting on the edge of the tub placing her hands on either side of it to steady herself and leaned over him.

She grinned slyly and replied seductively "That's all right you didn't scare me too much, so what were thinking about, no wait let me guess you were thinking about making love to me all morning and taking me out for a really big breakfast."

Clay sat up in the tub and said teasingly "Close." They kissed softly.

Sam smiled and said wryly "Yeah, now close was I ?"

He didn't answer her they just kissed some more.

Finally Clay replied jokingly "Actually I was...thinking of you.. soaking wet with all of your clothes on!"

He wrapped his hands around her waist and started to pull her in.

Immediately Sam grabbed onto the sides of the tub and tried with all of her might to stay out of it.

She yelled at him playfully "No, don't you dare, Clay no!"

Clay said happily "Yes, yes come here you!"

Sam finally relented to her fiancé's foreplay and allowed herself to be pulled into the tub.

She laughed for a few seconds then she turned her head and kissed him he kissed her back and soon the kissing they were doing was turning into a heated make out session.

Sam positioned herself so that she was straddling him and they continued to kiss she wrapped her arms around his neck.

She quickly slid out of the old pair of boxers of his she had wore to bed Clay shed his underwear as well and the two came together.

Their love making was always passionate and desperate.

Whenever they were finished no matter how happy she was when they had began Sam always felt a undeniable feeling of dread.

_He needs to get a new heart soon, I don't know how much more of this waiting I can take, I can't lose him, I just can't. _ Sam thought horrified.

Now was no different during this session of passion Sam couldn't help but feeling insurmountable dread during it.

They soon finished a few minutes later.

Clay slid his arms around her neck and pulled her against his chest.

He smiled stroked her face softly with his right hand and replied warmly "Sam, honey are you okay?"

She nodded and replied reassuringly "Yeah baby, I'm fine really just tired I guess, come on let's get ready we need to be at your mother's soon."

He smiled and released her reluctantly.

Clay then kissed her gently on her forehead and said softly "Okay you're right."

After they were finished talking Sam grabbed a bottle of shampoo and washed her hair then rinsed it.

When she was done the two of them got out of the tub and went over to the sink.

Clay applied shaving cream to his face and Sam got out her toothbrush and brushed her teeth she heard him curse and knew that he must of cut himself.

She said warmly "Oh, hold on a sec sweetheart."

Sam spit the last of the toothpaste that was in her mouth into the sink got a wet towel and held it up to him.

She asked warmly "Tell me if it hurts all right?"

As she went to clean out his cut, Clay screamed loudly at her.

Sam jumped back and quipped irritatedly "Jesus, your such a asshole, come here."

Clay said sweetly "I didn't scare you too much did I?"

Sam laughed and replied softly " Yeah you did."

She mopped up the rest of the cut until he wasn't bleeding anymore.

He asked her gently "So how does it look?"

Sam smiled at him and said mockingly "I think you'll live."

Clay replied softly "Thank you."

Sam looked at him lovingly and replied "Your welcome. "

She kissed him once on the lips then she kissed him again only this time it was a much more deep passionate kiss which lasted longer.

It had been four days since they had spent that wonderful morning together in her apartment.

Sam was still upset that Clay hadn't told his mother about them yet.

Standing in the fore way outside of Lilith's bedroom she wasn't completely sure if she should barge in on them now, but she needed her to sign off on some last minute forms and it couldn't wait.

So without hesitating Sam knocked on the wall and made her presence known to the two of them

She said formally "I'm sorry to disturb you, uh the door was open."

As usual Mrs. Beresford pretended not to of heard her.

She then said distractedly "Oh Sam it's you, well is there something you want?"

Used to being semi-ignored by her employer Sam took this all too familiar brush off in stride.

Holding up the clipboard she replied cordially "Yes, I just need your signature, I know it's late but I want to get these out tonight."

Smiling Lilith strode over to her and signed the papers when she was done.

She gave Sam a warm smile and said softly "You're too good to me Sam."

She gave Clay a miserable glance.

Then putting on a false smile Sam replied formally "Well if that will be all I should be heading home, Goodnight, Mrs. Beresford, Mr. Beresford."

Sam brushed past Clay and his mother and walked out of the house.

It was raining but, she didn't care, hopefully the cold rain would cool off the burning anger that she had inside of her.

She started briskly walking to the subway, with a fast gait that only people with incredible anger inside them as Sam had in her walked.

Clay caught up with her and said hurriedly " Sam, Sam, look, I'm sorry okay."

Sam turned around on her heel walked right over to him and replied infuriated "We've been engaged for six months and none of my friends even know that I have a boyfriend how do you think that makes me feel Clay huh, I mean I can't even wear my ring in public!"

Clay said nothing etched on his face was a look of immense sadness and regret.

She replied angrily " For Christ Sake Clay you know you can't be in the rain it isn't good for you!"

He sighed and said softly " Well why don't we go inside to get warm."

Sam stared at him with disbelief for a second then she replied anxiously " She'll see us."

Clay nodded at her.

Sam stepped under the umbrella and replied happily "Are you sure ?"

Clay nodded again and said assuredly "Yes I should of done this a long time ago, come on."

He ushered her inside.

Five minutes later she and Clay were walking out of his house. He had just told his mother of their relationship and as they predicated she was upset.

Clay who was breathing heavily sat down on the front steps and replied tiredly "Sam wait."

Sam looked at him with concern she immediately opened her purse and rifled through it furiously looking for the bottles of his various medications that she kept inside.

She said flustered "Oh, oh my god okay, nope that isn't it."

Finally finding the right one she opened up the bottle and tapped a few pills into her hand.

She replied reassuringly " Here we go I've found them, all right sweetie, all right open up honey."

Sam fed Clay his pills and replied anxiously " Oh are you okay?"

Having swallowed the medication Clay nodded tiredly.

Sam looked at him closely his breaths were coming out in short rapid intervals and he had a slight grayish tint to him.

Putting her right hand on his cheek she asked Clay again concernedly "Sweetheart are you sure you're all right?"

Clay took her hand off of his face he took it in his own taking a deep breath in he replied affirmatively "Yeah honey I'm fine, really I'm okay."

Sam said regretfully "I'm so sorry I just wanted to be recognized that's all I'm gonna go and leave you two alone okay so you can talk all right?"

Taking another deep breath Clay said earnestly "Marry me."

Sam stared at him in disbelief and replied awestruck "What, honey what are you saying?"

He replied again confidently "I want to marry you, tonight right now, I want to marry you tonight."

Sam said uncertainly "Sweetie, it's the middle of the night."

Clay shook his head adamantly

Taking her face between his palms he said passionately "I don't want to wait any longer we've waited too long as it is your it Sam I love you honey please will you marry me ?"

Sam wrapped her arms around his neck she said happily "Oh Clay, I love you, yes, yes I'll marry you!"

The two of them kissed and hugged.

Sam was skeptical on how Clay was going to pull off a wedding for them in the middle of the night, but he somehow put it all together.

He called his cardiologist and best friend Dr. Jack Harper, who in turn called in a few favors of his own and by the stroke of midnight she and Clay were preparing to get ready for their wedding.

Sam improvised the best she could by just taking her hair out of the bun that she had it in while still having the bulk of it pulled back at the top of her head by her favorite hair clasp and taking off her coat .

She had on her best blue cashmere sweater.

The only people at the wedding was the minister who was a patient of Jack's and had agreed on presiding over the ceremony because he owned him a favor, his wife was there as well to be a witness to the union, and Jack was their as Clay's best man.

Sam was extremely happy she just couldn't believe after a year of waiting she was finally going to marry Clay the man of her dreams and the one person she could and would defiantly be spending the rest of her life with.

As she spoke the vows happiness seemed to burst out an onward to the four other people in the church. After the minister announced them husband and wife the couple thanked Jack the minister and his wife and left the church.

On the steps of the church Clay scooped her up in his arms and carried her over the threshold of the church and all the way to her apartment.

As soon as she and Clay entered her apartment, they kissed relentlessly, Sam threw her coat onto the floor and tossed her purse and keys aside so that they made a loud clash when they hit the hard wood of the floor.

They didn't even notice or care as they were too engrossed in each other.

Kissing still Clay pushed her up against the wall then he picked her up and they went into the bedroom where they continued to kiss from their and began to disrobe.

Sam took off her sweater and pants and tossed them aside now only in her bra and panties, she laid down on the bed and Clay laid on top of her they continued to kiss.

She ran her hands down his body. Sam then threw her legs up pushing them hard against his inner thighs. She then went about unbuttoning his shirt which was still on.

Clay then kissed Sam's neck very passionately she laughed a bit and said worriedly "Clay, Clay whoa, _whoa,_ what are you doing?"

Clay looked at her intensely and said thickly "What do you think I'm doing, I'm making love to my wife."

Sam moaned she was so overcome with erotic pleasure.

She barely managed to get out her reply "God Clay that sounds so good, don't stop, please babe don't stop Ah, that feels so good!"

He obeyed by kissing her on her neck and started going down her body, they were just getting into a good rhythm when Sam heard a buzzing sound.

She said breathless "What is that noise?"

Sam dug into Clay's pants pocket and pulled out his vibrating pager.

She looked at it Clay was still kissing her but stopped at the sound of Sam's voice "Clay, Clay look."

He glanced at it for a moment and said assuredly "They are the only one's with the number."

Sam couldn't believe it it was the hospital they had found Clay a donor heart!

She said happily "Holy shit, honey this is amazing!" She kissed him

Clay replied breathlessly to her "I love you, so much."

Sam said ecstatic "I know I love you here." she quickly helped Clay get his shirt and pants off.

The couple made love until two o' clock in the morning.

At three they showered together got dressed and took a taxi to the hospital.

Just as they were about to go inside Clay stopped and stared at Sam.

A bit perplexed she looked at him and asked inquisitively "What, is it?"

He wrapped his arms her waist and held her for a few minutes just staring at her.

Finally he taking a deep breath in he looked at her clearly and replied softly "You know I love you, right?"

Sam looked at him quizzically and said "Of course I do, why are you asking me this?"

He kissed her and said warmly "It's nothing I just want you to know, that if something goes wrong tonight, you have always been my first and true love I ,really do love you baby."

Sam hugged and kissed him then said worriedly "Oh honey I love you too, please don't talk like that, you're gonna be fine, let's just go inside, okay?"

Clay kissed her again and replied "All right hon, let's go."

They held hands and went inside.

There standing in the waiting room were two members of Clay's surgical team, Jack, and Dr. Putnam.

Jack introduced Sam to Dr. Putnam and a few seconds into their discussion she also met the surgical nurse and fourth member of the team, Penny Carver.

Clay left to go see his mother and a man she had never seen before in the waiting room along with Jack. Sam didn't go with him, she just sat down in the waiting room and waited for him to come back.

Through she did watch the foursome, and even through she was a considerable length away she could tell by their body language that Lilith was extremely frustrated with Clay and vice versa.

Finally after a few minutes he came to where Sam was seated.

She got up and asked him anxiously "Honey is everything all right?"

He looked at her and said calmly "Yeah every thing's fine Sam, look I have to go now I'll be back soon all right?"

She kissed him softly then said "Sure sweetie, I'll be waiting for you."

Clay gave her one last kiss and went with Jack to be prepped.

When Sam next saw him Clay was in a stark green hospital gown being wheeled on a gurney by Jack.

She took his hand in hers and the three of them started to walk down the long corridor to the operating room.

Stopping just a yard away from the O.R. Jack said softly "All right I'm going to give you guys five minutes okay?"

Clay replied grateful "Thanks, Jack."

Sam knelt down so that she was at eye level with him. Clay took her left hand in his.

Touching her wedding ring gently he asked her passionately "It looks real nice honey, does it fit all right?"

She smiled and said thickly "Yeah, it fits perfect."

They looked at each other for a second.

Sam smiled and said mockingly "It's a interesting night we're having huh?"

Then with a slight smile Clay replied worriedly "I'm scared shitless."

Sam replied warmly "Yeah, I am too, but hey you know what? As soon as you get out of here, we're gonna start fresh we can get a little house on the beach, do it the right ya know chase sea gulls just like the old days it'll be great. Soon as you get out, I'll be right here honey."

After a minute Sam added her voice thick with emotion try as she might to conceal her fear form him

She whispered passionately "I love you.. _so much_."

Clay looked at her for a long second as if he wasn't ever going to see her again.

He then tenderly tucked a loose strand of her hair behind her right ear.

Clay smiled softly and said passionately "I know I love you too, Sam, do you think my new heart will love you as much as my old one did?"

She looked at him for a second then with misty eyes she bent down and gave him the softest most passionate kiss she could muster.

Jack then chimed in gently "Okay you lovebirds it's time to go."

Clay sighed and said jokingly "All right lead the way."

Jack chucked softly.

He then went over to Sam put a hand on her shoulder looking at her with compassionate albeit serious eyes said "I promise Sam, I'm gonna take excellent care of him, all right?"

Sam gave Jack a warm hug and whispered to him "I know you will Jack, thank you."

Jack then went over to Clay to wheel him towards the O.R.

As he was being wheeled down the hall Clay shouted playfully "I'll see you soon...wife... I love you!"

Sam smiled in spite of her fear and shouted back warmly "I love you more, say that again baby!"

Clay obliged by shouting "Wife!" he waved slightly to her, wagging his left hand softly.

Sam sighed hugging herself she thought, _We can get through this I know we can the strength of our love can get me and him through this it has too._

Feeling tears coming again she thought, _Jack please take good care of my baby, take good care of my husband._

Sam then walked over to the waiting room and sat down.

Holding her ring finger she braced herself for the long agonizing wait.

Knowing that the strength of her love for Clayton Beresford Jr. would get her though it and his love for her would get him thorough it as well.


End file.
